


Now

by jaekayelle



Series: The Affair [6]
Category: Pirates of the Caribbean (Movies)
Genre: F/M, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-05-05
Updated: 2018-05-05
Packaged: 2019-05-02 09:10:51
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 7,731
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14541438
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/jaekayelle/pseuds/jaekayelle
Summary: It's no longer "too soon."





	Now

**Author's Note:**

> Rating: NC-17  
> Pairings: Jack Sparrow/James Norrington, Theodore Groves/Andrew Gillette  
> Disclaimer: Disney and Bruckheimer own their characters. Mine are not to be used without permission. No copyright infringement intended. No profits made from this work of fiction.  
> Originaly Posted: 12/06/04  
> Note: Combining requests from porridgebird: "what happens after it's no longer too soon", and ima_pseudonym: would "like to know more about Gillette and Groves" into one fic. Also, the kids are only mentioned in this one. ;-)

"I'm feeling guilty," James confessed. He and Jack were lying together in the hammock in the garden, lazily swaying in the warm breeze off the ocean. The property was in the hills outside Port Royal, but rested on a spit of land that extended down to the ocean. They often wandered down to the beach to stare at the sea when the children were down for their afternoon naps. Today was a lazy day, though, and they hadn't gotten any farther than the garden, drawn to the hammock and the idea of lying in it together.  
Jack snuggled closer, as he was half asleep like a cat dozing in the sun. His head was on James' chest, and one arm lay possessively across James' stomach. James' fingers trailed up and down that arm, seemingly without purpose except to touch.

"Guilty about what, Jamie love?" Jack murmured.

James trailed his lips over Jack's hair. Despite its ropey appearance it was remarkably soft. "For making you wait."

Lifting his head Jack said, "If it was a problem I'd have ravished you months ago."

"Or you'd have left?" James had to ask; it had been preying on his mind for weeks now despite believing in their love. What if it proved to be not enough?

"Told you I'm not leaving. You'll have to throw me out this time."

"Never," James whispered hoarsely.

"Good." Jack snuggled back against his side. "Go to sleep."

"It's barely two in the afternoon."

"Perfect time for a nap."

It was difficult to argue with logic like that.

#

It had been one of his bad days. James was prone to brooding, Jack knew, but since they had reunited he had done little of it in Jack's presence. His tall, beautiful lover did take long walks by himself whenever he could get away with it, so it was possible that was when he indulged in his natural tendencies. Jack's natural tendency in such situations was to drink himself senseless. He'd done little of that since moving into the manor house. It was tricky getting soused when there were little ones about. Katie had woken up in the middle of one night and came down to the kitchen where Jack sat on the floor with his back to the cupboards and a bottle of rum between his legs. Her wide-eyed stare was enough to make him more careful about choosing the when and where for his drinking. After a couple of nights of seeking out a hideaway he finally admitted it wasn't worth it if he had to hide from the little girl he already thought of as his own daughter. And Matthew adored him. He couldn't let the lad see him drinking, either. Not that the barely-toddler aged child would show up in the kitchen after midnight.

Jack couldn't say for sure what had James brooding, but he knew why he had been drinking. They were back together after too many years apart, yet they had not done anything more than kiss and hold one another. They slept in the same bed. Every morning they awoke tangled together, erections grazing legs, hips or bellies, and then one or both would roll away and pretend like it hadn't happened. Jack was prepared to wait as long as it took for James to get comfortable with the idea of them making love again. It had only been a month since James' return to Port Royal, after all, and just over three months since his wife had died in childbirth. Jamie was an honourable man and could not bear to sully the memories of his marriage. Jack knew Jamie had loved Sarah, loved her still, and he couldn't fault him for that. He'd met the lady and was briefly tempted to steal her away for himself, just for a bit of fun, but hadn't acted on it. But James' conflict was tormenting him. And it was tormenting Jack.

Every morning Jack would sneak off to the garden before the sun reached it, to take care of his pressing need in solitude. He refused to let James find out, not wanting to add to his love's burdens. By the time they saw each other again at breakfast Jack would be, well, not satisfied exactly, but able to meet the day and James' eye. The rum helped, too, only now he had to give that up. The things a man had to do for love, but he would do it and gladly.

Today James had been in a mood. He found fault with the servants, the weather, himself, and Jack's and the children's antics. By the time he got to Jack and the children he had reined himself in with visible effort and apologized to Jack with a lingering kiss—the longest and most loving they had shared in weeks, and then he took the children for a walk, just the three of them, father and babies. It nearly broke Jack's heart, because it was so beautiful to see them going off hand in hand. Later, however, the children returned alone saying their da had sent them inside and that he would be back later.

Jack saw to it that the nanny supervised the poppets, and then, curious as a cat, he went off to look for James. He found him sitting on a boulder overlooking the beach, watching the sun sink into the ocean. Something told Jack not to intrude on his solitude, so he hung back a few feet away out of sight and leaned against a tree to observe. For a long while James did nothing. He did not move at all, but then he lifted a hand to his face. Jack adjusted his position just enough to see James' profile. His cheeks were wet but he did not wipe them. Instead, he held his hand over his mouth as if to hold something back. After a moment a muffled sob escaped through his fingers, and then another.

Watching James' shoulders begin to shake, Jack took two steps toward him and stopped. He ached to go to his lover and hold him, but knew his presence would not be welcome right now. James needed to mourn Sarah. He needed to get his grief out to refresh his soul. He hadn't been able to do that in an active household with children and servants and frequent guests. He didn't even get the privacy he needed in his own bedroom with Jack sleeping beside him every night. A proud man, James had been too long in the Navy to know how to properly express his emotions except in private. The one breakdown Jack had witnessed had been after an extremely trying voyage from England, and when they had just reunited after so many years apart. Not even James' iron willpower could stop the tears that day.

It was one of the harder things Jack had done in a while, but he turned away from his grieving lover and let him have his privacy.

#

Jack was in bed reading when James came upstairs later that night. He watched as James stripped off his clothing, thankfully forgoing that blasted nightshirt he'd recently taken to wearing, and climbed in beside Jack who, as usual, was nude. For a few minutes James merely lay on his back with his eyes closed.  
Suddenly, he rolled over and took the book out of Jack's hands, setting it aside on the bedside table.

"What're ye doin', love?" Jack noted that his eyes were puffy and bloodshot, but otherwise clearly shining with love. Desire was there, too, muted by the grief that never entirely went away, but Jack knew James wanted him, and it seemed he might be willing to do something about it this time.

"Making things right by you," James breathed into Jack's mouth, confirming Jack's suspicions and hopes. "At least, as right as I can make them at this time. Forgive me if it's not enough."

Jack quivered under him. "Whatever you're plannin' will be completely acceptable, I'm sure."

James smiled against his lips. His hand brushed across Jack's chest over and over, the lightest of touches that sent shivery heat throughout Jack's body. His thumb stroked tiny circles over the increasingly sensitized skin. He moved down Jack's breastbone to rub lightly over a nipple, until it puckered and rose enquiringly.

Their kisses intensified, especially after James' hand closed on Jack's arousal. Wanting to give as well as receive, Jack dragged his fingertips down James' chest and abdomen until he reached his goal. James pushed his hand away saying, "This isn't about me." He pumped Jack's cock with firm, quick strokes.

Needing to do something with his hands, Jack gripped James' shoulders and back before sliding down to cup his buttocks. Jack arched under the assault on his senses and body. The tiny bit of awareness he still retained told him that the hardness pressing into his thigh required attention, so he shifted just a little and moved his leg up and down. The resulting moans—twins to his own—reverberating against his neck, and the wetness trailing across his thigh, told him James was not so averse to a little help after all. Soon James was humping his leg but determinedly not giving up his self-appointed duty to pleasure Jack.

Their movements grew rougher and what little rhythm they had vanished in the power of their need. Jack climaxed first in a surging release, arching and then falling. Even as he subsided onto the bed James blindly followed him down still seeking his own freedom. He cried out when he achieved it but had the good sense to muffle his shouts against Jack's shoulder, biting down a little. It hurt but Jack gladly endured it for the pleasure of seeing James let go of his demons and guilt. James settled his head on Jack's chest, and just breathed. There was a half-smile on his face as his long eyelashes fluttered over his cheeks. Jack brushed dark hair off his lover's forehead and kissed him there.

"You were so beautiful when you crested, Jamie love."

"'Crested.' I like that," James said quietly.

"How you feelin'?"

James did not answer right away. Jack was fairly certain James had not fallen asleep, so he waited. Finally, "Content."

"Y'worried that it wouldn't be enough for me," Jack said. "It was everything because it was with you."

Still not opening his eyes, James said, "You say the sweetest things."

"I 'preciate what you did for me, Jamie. I'm happy you got satisfied in the bargain."

"You're very talkative after sex. I'd forgotten that you get that way at times."

"Just when I'm in love."

That resulted in James cracking one eyelid open and a lazy smile appeared. "Love you too."

They lay quietly for a few moments. Then Jack said, "I don't want to spoil this, but are you sure you're all right?"

"You know me very well," James said before admitting, "I still feel guilty; maybe more so now. I'm not sure I can be any more intimate with you than this."

"It's enough."

"For now. What about later?"

"There's plenty of things we can do without fucking, Jamie."

"I suppose," he sighed. "It feels like I'm cheating on Sarah. I need to get past this or it could tear us apart later."

"You're worrying too much, love. We made it past our separation. We can handle this. You just lost your wife. Give yourself some time to grieve for her. You're the one who said you needed time to do it properly. Why the rush?"

"Because I love you."

Jack chuckled. "Doesn't exactly answer the question but it's a fine answer nevertheless."

"Because I don't want to cheat on you, too. It felt like I was being unfaithful to you during my marriage to Sarah. I never stopped loving you. I resisted falling in love with her. She practically proposed to me. It wasn't until I realized that I did love her and that she and I were good friends as well as lovers, that I gave in and agreed to marry her." He rolled over and pressed the palms of his hands over his face. "God! I sound so pathetic. Did you know I fumbled my proposal to Elizabeth that day she fell off the fort wall?"

"You're a man's man, Jamie," Jack said with an impish twinkle in his voice. "You and women get along well enough where it's necessary, but you'll always need a good man at your side or under you in your bed. Like me, f'r'instance."

James lowered his hands and gave in to his sense of humour. He rolled back and pressed himself to Jack's side again, eyes tightly shut.

"Arrghh! You are going to need the patience of ten men to put up with me."

"I have a possible solution," Jack said after a bit.

"Such as?"

"We take a holiday."

Both eyes opened.

"When and where?"

#

Anamaria glowered at them from the helm of the Black Pearl. When Jack dared to look in her direction she snapped, "Dis ship is not a ferry service!"  
"So you said about an hour ago," he pointed out very reasonably, James thought, but then ruined it when he added testily, "and the hour before that and ten minutes before that!"

Anamaria muttered something about madmen and Englishmen, which James took to mean he was included in the insult. Then she spat, "Ye said ye gave me dis ship! Yet we're supposed to come runnin' whenever ye gets a whim to go on a holiday!"

"It's the first time I asked you to take us anywhere, love." Jack had sidled closer to her—foolishly so, in James' opinion. He would never admit it aloud, but the woman at the helm frightened him just a little. Purely in the aspect that she might castrate Jack, not due to the possibility of anything she would do to him. Now Jack had the nerve to stand within striking distance of the Pearl's new captain. James' heart ached for Jack. He knew what a sacrifice it was for Jack to give up his beloved ship, but arthritis was making it difficult for the former pirate to sail as much as he wanted to. He seemed to do much better on land playing with the children, who were, thankfully, back in Port Royal with Elizabeth Turner watching over them. Sometimes James was convinced his lover was as much a child as Katie and Matthew. His son was still pretty much a babe in arms, but his daughter was a little whirlwind on legs—a lot like Jack, come to think of it. It was getting more difficult to tell who was her real father as she picked up some of his lover's mannerisms.

He watched as Jack calmed Anamaria with some low-voiced words. She softened visibly but the scowl never completely left her lovely face. It seemed as though she had to fight to keep from smiling, something he had yet to witness. As if reading his mind, she shot him a vicious look that made him straighten his spine and glare right back at her with all the force at his command. She met his look head on and nodded slightly before returning her attention to guiding the ship through the warm waters. He had just passed some kind of test.

Jack returned to his side and leaned against him. James placed an arm around his shoulders. Jack grinned up at him before rising up on tiptoes and kissing him lightly.

"Pirate," James said.

"Eh?"

"You stole that kiss."

Jack brightened. "Aye."

"You also stole my heart years ago."

"Aye," Jack grinned broadly.

"Mush," said Anamaria, proving her ears were sharper than either of them had suspected. Jack stuck his tongue out at her. James led him away, out of her sight and her hearing.

"Does she know?" he asked.

"Know what?"

"That you haven't really given her the ship?"

Jack reacted by rearing back, his hand finding its stuttering way to his chest and his eyes growing wider. "James! I'm surprised at you."

"For thinking you'd cheat Anamaria?"

"No, for thinking I'd do anything to let her know that I was cheating her."

"I have yet to figure out how you did it," James confessed.

"Told her she could captain my ship. I did not at any time tell her she could be the captain or that she could have it outright. I meant to, Jamie, but when the moment came I couldn't do it."

James squeezed Jack's shoulder in support. "I know. Your intentions were good, but I know how much the Pearl means to you."

"You mean everything to me. If I had to I would give up my ship forever for you."

"I'd never ask that of you, Jack."

"Thank you, Jamie love, but meanwhile Ana is free to sail her. She'll take good care of my Pearl. I can always find a way to bring her back to me when I need her."

"Like now."

"Aye. Even if I don't have anywhere to go but just want to see my ship."

"It is good of you to take me to see Theo and Andrew."

"Well, I could have told you where they are but you need a guide to find the island."

"Somewhere only that broken compass of yours can find?"

Jack grinned, his teeth flashing gold in the bright sun. "You're a smart man, Jamie love."

"Is that a yes or a no?"

"It's a I'm your guide and you sit back and enjoy the view."

"Aye, Cap'n," James replied.

The kiss that earned him nearly made him forget his decision not to properly bed Jack just yet. Of course, there were no beds in the immediate vicinity but that cannon over there looked sturdy.

#

They shared a bed for the duration of the voyage, just as they did at home, sleeping wound together and showing remarkable restraint in not ravishing one another, contenting themselves with variations of their first night's activities. It helped that they were both bound by the choice not to become totally intimate. James was amazed at Jack's continuing willingness to go along with it. When he questioned him, Jack told him, "I love you." That seemed to be that. James suspected it had something to do with Jack leaving him a few years earlier, making a decision that should have been made by the two of them. Of course, if James had had any say in it they never would have parted, and he might never have met Sarah or fathered Katie and Matthew. He could not imagine his children not being in his life now. Things had a way of working out as they were supposed to, but he still regretted those years he was apart from Jack. Nothing to be done for it now, except to be grateful they were together now. Every time he brooded about it Jack pulled him out of his darkening moods with a golden grin, or an oddly endearing bit of nonsense that should only have charmed youngsters, not a grown man who was also a retired Admiral.

Jack was so much more than a quirky former pirate, but he seemed to have settled into that persona now. It might have been for the sake of the children or it might have been for Jack's own sake. Only Jack knew for sure.

#

They reached the island in two days under Anamaria's expert sailing and Jack's direction. Not once did Jack ask to steer the ship although James could tell he wanted to. Anamaria did not offer the helm to him. It was clear she felt the Pearl was her ship and she pointedly made certain everyone knew it.

The longboat was lowered off the side of the ship; ready for them to row to the nameless island that was their destination. As they made ready to leave Anamaria approached.

"We return in three days. Be ready or ye be left here." With that she stalked off to yell at some hapless crewmembers.

Jack sent her a mock salute behind her back. "Aye, sir!"

James pulled him with him as he clambered down the side to the waiting boat, anxious to be gone before Anamaria lost her tenuous hold on her temper.

"Three days?" he asked Jack. "Where will they go for three days?"

"Away from us. She's making a point. She'll sit out there out of sight and sulk, and in three days she'll come back to make us regret it."

They were greeted at the beach by some of the natives, sunny, smiling people who were only too happy to see them, a marked contrast to the reaction of their presence on the pirate ship. These people spoke a language that was a strange mix of a Jamaican dialect and what sounded like Portuguese. Whatever it was, James was at a loss to understand it.

"What are they saying?" he asked.

"Damned if I know, love. Just smile back and you'll do fine," was Jack's advice.

They were led towards a village of grass and bamboo huts; a thoroughly primitive place, yet it held some charm. After all, when one lived in such a beautiful geographic area who needed manor houses and carriages? James felt himself relaxing already. Jack took his hand and walked beside him, totally content by the look of it. James carried a small bag that clinked and clunked in his free hand.

When they reached the first few huts James spotted the two reasons for their visit. Theo Groves and Andrew Gillette, former captains in the Royal British Navy, were engaged in a board game of some sort in the shade of one of the huts. Theo had his back to their approach but Andrew happened to glance up. A slow smile broke out on his sunburned face and he reached across the makeshift table to tap Theo on the arm. Blinking, Theo questioned the break in his concentration and then turned when Andrew indicated he should. He was on his feet and moving towards them in seconds, with Andrew right behind him.

"James!"

Theo flung his arms around James and the two men hugged, pounded each other on the back and then hugged some more. Finally they parted and Andrew extended a hand, which James took, using it to pull him into an embrace as well. He and Andrew were not as close as he had been with Theo; in fact, in another life he might have pursued a sexual relationship with Theo, however, it was not meant to be, but James counted Theo as his closest friend after Jack. Andrew was part and parcel of that friendship but he did enjoy his counsel and closeness as well.

Theo then embraced Jack with not quite as much enthusiasm as he had James, but managed to convey his delight at seeing the man who had saved his and Andrew's lives.

"There's so much to catch up on. The Royal mail doesn't exactly get delivered here with any degree of regularity," Theo joked. "How are you? You look well. Is Sarah with you?"

Once again, James felt the clammy fist of grief squeeze his heart. Every time he had to explain the circumstances of his return to the Caribbean he wished he could skip it and go straight to the reminiscing with friends.

"Could we wait until we sit in the shade, preferably with something to drink? I'd rather not go over this here on the beach."

Theo regarded him with concern. "Of course, James."

"Come see our humble abode," Andrew invited with a wave of his hand.

Jack slipped his hand into James' as they followed their hosts. Neither of them was one hundred percent whole in gait making walking in sand tricky for them both. They stepped carefully across the soft stuff and sat on makeshift chairs outside where the board game had been set up. James noted that it was a chess set crudely carved from wood.

"This looks like Andrew's work," he commented to give himself time before he had to explain about Sarah.

The redhead beamed. "It is, but Theo suggested it. He got tired of listening to me talking about the variety of birds on this island. He wanted something else to occupy our time."

"Something besides what you might expect us to be doing, that is." Theo added with a sly smile.

Andrew flushed bright red but grinned back at his lover.

James laughed good-naturedly, happy to be with his friends again. He glanced at Jack, who seemed to be enjoying their visit so far, but when he glanced James' way it was clear he was concerned about something. James thought he knew what it was. Time to get this over with. He cleared his throat.

"I, uh, have something to tell you, Theo; Andrew." The words came out in a rush after that. "Sarah died in childbirth this past June. That is why I came back to the Caribbean. Well, actually, it's not the only reason. Oh, hell. I'm saying this all wrong." He rubbed a hand over his eyes, ashamed to feel the sting of tears. A hand that offered much support, comfort and love rubbed between his shoulder blades. Jack. He leaned into the touch slightly as he sat up straighter, more under control.

"Oh, god. James, I am so sorry." Theo reached across the table to clasp his arm above the elbow. Andrew murmured his condolences. "So you're living in Port Royal again?"

James nodded shakily. "I bought the old Carlson estate and took the children there. Elizabeth and Will Turner were a great help in getting us settled, but it was Jack who helped the most." He managed a smile for Jack who shifted closer. "Um, Jack is living with us now."

Two pairs of eyebrows lifted at that news.

"Oh?" Theo said. "Isn't that rather... soon? Not that I'm the least bit judgemental, of course. I just want you to be happy and to be certain you're doing the right thing."

James sighed. "It's a long story."

"Jamie's lass gave us her blessing before she passed," Jack interjected.

"Or, perhaps, not that long a story," James said. At the inquiring looks on the faces of two of his friends he elaborated. "Sarah figured out my feelings for Jack. I'm not sure how or when, but she did give us her blessing."

Unable to stand the compassionate expressions on their faces, James changed the subject. "I thought about bringing the children to meet their uncles, but decided it best to do that another time."

"This is our holiday, Jamie," Jack reminded him.

"And what do you think of James' children, Captain Sparrow?" James knew Theo's mind and expressions well enough to recognize suspicion when he saw it. Theo suspected Jack of being jealous of the children's claim on James.

Jack clucked his tongue. "We had this discussion once, Theodore. You are to call me Jack. As for the poppets, I'm very fond of the little critters. They're Jamie's, after all. How could I not love them?"

"Katie, in particular, adores Jack. She thinks he's her own special toy come to life."

"Here now!" Jack somehow exclaimed with a leer. "I'm your toy and no one else's."

James blushed helplessly while the others had a good laugh at his expense.

"What Jack meant by this being our holiday is that I'm having a difficult time dealing with losing Sarah. Jack thought getting away for a few days might help. My heart has already been lightened just seeing the two of you again. Even though he told me you were safe I never really stopped worrying."

Theo touched the back of James' hand. "We're better than safe, James. We're happy."

"And we'd love to meet your children the next trip you make here," Andrew added. "But how long can you stay this time?"

"The Pearl will return for us in three days."

"So you're still sailing, Jack?" Theo asked.

"No. I'm retired. Just like the Admiral here."

"Retired!" Theo grinned. "I thought perhaps you were the law in these waters again, James."

"My days of pirate hunting are past."

"Don't you miss it?" Andrew asked.

"Some days, yes. Most of the time, not even a bit."

"Jamie has caught the best pirate there ever was," Jack preened, playing with his chin braids.

"And I'm not letting him go this time."

"Ye gods, James! You two are worse than Andrew and I."

The four men had a good laugh over that, and then the conversation finally turned to ships and the Navy and piracy. Soon they were enjoying the company and the fine wine and brandy they had brought as gifts. James relaxed fully for the first time in a very long while.

#

That night, however, James' demons came back to taunt him. He and Jack bedded down on the beach under the stars and bathed by the warm night breezes off the water. Jack wriggled close so that he was tucked under the protective arm of his lover. James glanced down at him.

"Jack?"

"Hmm?"

"Are you sure you're all right living on land? I mean you're a born sailor. Do you have any regrets about living with me on the estate?"

"Do you?"

"Do I what?" James asked, not understanding the question.

"You're as much a sailor as I am. Do you miss the sea?"

"I miss it terribly, but I cannot in all good conscience raise my family on a ship."

"Why not? Is it so terrible a thing?"

"Well... no. But I," he stopped. What was so wrong about living on a ship? Part of it was about wanting to keep Jack close. Jack's arthritis made it painful for him to spend much time at sea. He could easily live on a ship but would soon find he couldn't actually sail a ship any longer. He already knew that. It would be cruel to put him in such a situation. Having home and hearth gave them a place to be together that was healthier for Jack. But what he said was, "I'd worry about the children falling overboard."

"A tragedy to be sure, but they could get seriously hurt on land just as easily."

"True."

"You're the one who started this conversation, Jamie. I'm happy to be wherever you are. If you decide to live in a banyan tree I'll move with you."

He did not mention that he would have trouble climbing said tree. Jack seldom acknowledged his condition, preferring to live his life as if he was still as limber as he had been ten years ago. James knew he would have trouble climbing a tree, too. He had fallen out of a few before he was eight years old and hadn't tried since. Now, with his weakened leg, there was no way he would even try.

"Yes, I miss the sea," Jack said with some heat. "It's in my blood. It's you who has a problem with our life. You tip toe around as if you're afraid the poppets will break. Hell, you act as though I'll break. I'm tougher than I look and you know it."

He pushed away and got to his feet, moving gracefully—probably out of sheer strength of will.

"I'm going for a walk."

James sat there and watched him go, limping again despite his best efforts not to do so.

Then, suddenly seized by the very real fear that Jack wouldn't come back, he got awkwardly to his feet and loped after him, his long legs eating up the distance. Only when he reached Jack's side did he notice the pain in his upper thigh where he'd been wounded. He shoved the discomfort deep into a part of his mind where he could deal with it later. There were more important things to take care of first.

"Wait, Jack. Please."

Jack walked on a few more steps before finally coming to a halt. He stared out to sea rather than look at James. Then he dropped his head and turned around, one eyebrow cocked questioningly.

"I'm so sorry, sweetheart," James blurted out. "I've nearly botched everything between us this past month. I've never been a widower with children before. I barely know how to be a parent. Sarah took the lead on much of it and I just followed. I can command a squadron of ships and men but I'm still finding my way with my own life. If that makes me less attentive to you then I apologize."

"Jamie, Jamie. You're doing a fine job of being a papa and you're excellent at being my spouse. You just need to relax and trust your instincts with all of us. We aren't going to break. The young ones are resilient and I'm too wily to let anything bad happen to m'self. I've got a very strong survival instinct, you know. Let me help you with the poppets. I think they like me."

"They love you," James said hoarsely.

"Do you think Sarah would have told you to come back to me thinking that her children would somehow suffer for it?"

His throat was too constricted to speak, so James shook his head.

"A'right then. If I'm not mistaken, you're still feeling guilty about loving me and loving Sarah. It's time to let go of that guilt. It's time to live for you and the rest will fall into place. Look at your young captains back at the hut. They survived nearly getting themselves arrested and hanged. They gave up life in civilization to be together. We have a lovely home with a garden and a hammock, and woods and a beach, and books and a cook. And we have each other. Let's enjoy it."

Biting his lip, James moved closer and then closer still until he could put his arms around Jack. Right before Jack wrapped him up tight in his arms James said, "It's time."

#

James gave himself permission to love Jack without reservation. They could not keep their hands off each other after that. For the rest of their stay on the island they spent a lot of time seeking privacy where they could indulge in all sorts of sexual activities, but always short of full intercourse. Since their first time ever had been in a brothel in Tortuga, they both agreed that they wanted their new first time together to be in their own bed at home. And so their holiday could not come swiftly enough to an end, although they had a lot of fun until that time.

Anamaria brought the Pearl to outside the lagoon on schedule. The four men said their goodbyes and Jack and James rowed out to meet it. They spent most of the voyage secluded in their cabin trying out variations on favourite positions, emerging once or twice a day to eat or get some air. The smiles on their faces told everyone exactly what they'd been doing to amuse themselves, and so they were the victims of much teasing by the crew.

Ana kept away from them until they were half a day out of Port Royal, or rather the cove where the Pearl could safely put in without having the Navy descend on them. The new Commodore wasn't quite as understanding about that particular pirate ship as James was when he was in command, so they avoided confrontations.

The knock on the cabin door sounded just when Jack was about to swallow James to the root.

"Ignore it," James told him.

Another knock. Jack lifted his head, shrugged and returned to what he had been doing.

"Jack!" Ana called. "If ye be wanting to steer your ship ye best be getting yerself out here now. I won't make the offer twice."

Both men froze. James was close but not close enough for Jack to finish him off in the next few seconds. Sucking furiously and using his hand to hurry things along, Jack inadvertently pulled a hair causing James to yelp in pain.

"Sorry, love."

Glaring down at the dark head between his thighs, James said, "Just go already, before you cause permanent damage down there."

"I can't leave you now..."

"Yes. You can. Go. I'll take care of it myself and join you. If you miss this opportunity you'll never forgive yourself or me. Just don't let Anamaria see me like... this." He waved a hand nervously at his bare body spread across the bed. He felt unaccountably shy about Anamaria seeing him naked. They had been provided with one thin sheet and it was over there in a crumpled ball. It wouldn't cover much anyway.

Jack was already on his feet rapidly pulling his clothing to order. He leaned down and gave James a quick kiss before bounding off towards the door. Watching him go, James mused that perhaps the Pearl might be the cure to Jack's arthritis after all. Then Jack squeezed out of the cabin pulling the door firmly shut behind him. James caught a glimpse of Ana trying to see inside, but was fairly certain that Jack had cut her off before she saw anything.

He flopped back on the bed, his hand unerringly going to his groin. He pulled a few times finding his previous level of arousal, and then his other hand cupped and rolled his balls. Soon he was imagining Jack perfecting his technique on him. With lots of practice Jack had turned his talent for sucking to an art form, making it easy to picture his dark head bobbing between James' legs and to "feel" his lips and tongue on him. With a groan James pushed his head back into the mattress, arched into his own touch and came in his hand.

Giving himself a few moments to recover, James got up, washed himself and then dressed. He wandered out into the bright Caribbean sunshine in search of his lover. He found him at the helm caressing the wheel as though it was James' body and whispering to the ship. James was half aroused and half jealous at the sight.

When he approached Jack opened his eyes and sent a brilliant smile to him that rivalled the sun. James immediately let go of the jealousy part of his reaction and went to Jack almost fully aroused. He plastered himself to Jack's back to hide his obvious erection from watching eyes, his arms going around Jack's waist and hands locking in front. Jack felt the poke in his buttocks and pushed back against it, giving a little wriggle to tease.

James kissed his neck and nuzzled the thick hair. "Cut it out," he said mildly.

"Ye don't sound too put out, mate."

James snorted. "Five minutes at the helm and you sound like a pirate again."

"How do ye know this isn't how I actually talk, darlin'?"

"When we make love you talk to me in perfect, classically educated English. That is, when you're not speaking Spanish or French or Dutch or some Chinese dialect—all of which sound like you had a tough schoolmaster standing over you with a cane while you learned."

"So, yer sayin' this way of speakin' is an affectation?"

"Or an act. Yes."

Jack's response was to say, "Just one minute, Pearl, my darling." Then he reached back to roughly stroke James' hard length through his tight breeches, causing him to moan and bury his face in Jack's hair. Jack bent forward under the pressing weight of having the taller man draped over him, and he chuckled.

"You're going to make my ship jealous, Jamie."

"Too bad. You belong to me now. She had her chance."

Jack took his hand away, but gave James' leg a pat before taking the wheel again. "We better not get carried away out here in front of God and everyone. Did you take care of your... need after I left?"

"I did, thank you very much. I had a lot of practice before I met you and I haven't lost my ...touch."

Then they both giggled like schoolboys at his words and then glanced around to see if anyone was watching. Anamaria stood a short distance away. She rolled her eyes but she was smiling when she turned away.

"Jamie."

"Mm hmm."

"When Ana came to get me out here to the helm she said the Pearl was my ship." As James' arms tightened around him, Jack added, "I always knew Ana understood."

"It'd be difficult for anyone not to believe that the Pearl belongs to one man only."

Jack sailed his ship home.

#

He slid his hands across Jack's chest, featherlight and teasing. Jack moaned softly and James swallowed it with a kiss. More kisses followed, wet, sloppy ones interspersed with sensual explorations all over Jack's body, driving him mad with need, until he demanded and begged and cursed. James' laughter was sheer torture vibrating on his skin, over his nipples, up and down the inside of his thighs and all around his straining cock.

"Jamie... please! Finish me off."

Sitting up, James regarded him with lifted brow.

"Pardon?" he asked if not understanding. There was just enough humour in his voice that made Jack want to slug him with his boot that was just about within reach of his fingers... seeing as how he was hanging upside down over the side of the bed.

Jack had no idea how he'd gotten in such a position. He lunged upwards, fingers hooked and grasping. James leaned backwards out of range. Scrambling onto his knees, Jack planted his hands on his hips and glared.

"Do me!"

"Do you?"

"Aye!"

"You do?"

"Aye!"

"I do, too. And I take you as my awfully unwedded husband." James smirked.

Jack cocked his head. "Have you gotten into my rum, Jamie love?"

Mirroring Jack's position except for the angry hands on hips, James knelt across from him. "No rum. I am simply overcome with love. You intoxicate me, Jack." He cupped Jack's face. "I am so sorry I kept you from me."

Jack said, "That whole time we slept in each other's arms, love. You welcomed me back into your life after years apart because of my foolishness. How was that keeping me from you? I don't ask anything more, except that you finish what you started!" He pointed firmly at his determined erection.

"Lie down."

An enormous grin on his face, Jack did as he was told. He arranged himself against the pillows and spread his legs. James followed him down until his face was in Jack's lap. Jack watched as the pink tip of James' tongue darted out to catch the beads of ejaculate dripping from the darkened tip of Jack's cock. He shivered helplessly, anticipating, wanting, and needing. Excitement rolled up his body into the back of his throat. When James took him in and swallowed him whole, Jack placed his hands on the silky dark hair, fingers sinking into the soft strands and gently encouraging him.

Soft moans quickly rose in intensity until Jack was babbling loudly, crying out James' name and swearing all at the same time. He bit down on his own hand to stifle the noise, but that hurt so he grabbed a pillow and stuffed a corner of that in his mouth. When James made funny little sounds deep in his throat, the vibrations tickled Jack's nether regions and he came suddenly and hard, his screams muffled by the sack of feathers.

He lost track of everything, gradually becoming aware of James settled beside him, gently petting and soothing to bring him back. Jack was surprised to feel tears on his face. He sniffed and wiped them away.

"Ah, Jamie. That was the best I've had in years. Possibly since that time you fucked me right off Francis's bed in Tortuga."

"That was more due to your propensity for sliding around like an eel than anything I did."

"What was all that about awful wedded or unwedded husbands?"

"Just me being silly."

Jack grinned. "I'm impressed. The great Commodore Norrington can be silly."

"I'm a retired admiral now. It's allowed."

"Why are you wearing that huge, baggy nightshirt again?" Jack asked. "It's a horrible thing to behold—covering up your beautiful body the way it does. Take it off and I'll take care of you." His gaze flicked to James' straining cock.

"I have something better in mind." James sat on his heels and lifted his nightshirt, slowly rolling it upwards until he emerged with his long hair a mess, his lips parted and his eyes heavy-lidded with lust.

Jack only had eyes for the long, exposed torso and the defined muscles pulling tautly across James' flat stomach. He reached for him, making grabby gestures with his hands.

"Mine!"

"Oh, yes."

James flowed forward into his waiting embrace, covering Jack with his bigger body. Their kisses were particularly sweet that night, flavoured with years of love and patience. Their joining should have been bittersweet given all the heartbreak that had kept them apart, but they had exorcised those demons on the island and were now ready to move forward. Looking back was not an option. Jack bent his knees, opening himself for James. Moments later they rocked together with Jack's heels locked around James' hips and James' hands caressing Jack anywhere he could reach.

Jack gazed up at his lover, more precious to him now than ever. Jack felt lust-smacked. He could barely think straight—not an uncommon feeling when they were together, but this time he was so overwhelmed by the love he felt for James that it was as if his entire being was somehow lighter. He could walk on air now. He could fly to the moon, he was sure of it, and then his climax took him beyond even the sun.

#

James woke to the beating of Jack's heart under his ear. By the way it sped up when he stirred he could tell that Jack was also awake. The hand on his back felt nicely warm and heavy, now slowly stroking along his spine.  
"Well," James said. "That was worth waiting for."

"Oh, aye," Jack agreed. "Want to do it again?"

 


End file.
